Heathers (1988)
Patrick Labyorteaux: Ram Sweeney
Photos
Quotes
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Ram Sweeney : [after watching J.D. flirt with Veronica] Let's kick his ass!
Kurt Kelly : Shit, Ram - we're seniors, man. We're too old for that kind of crap. Let's give 'im a good scare, though.
[They walk to where J.D. is sitting]
Ram Sweeney : [Sticking his fingers into J.D.'s lunch] You gonna eat this?
Kurt Kelly : What did your boyfriend say when you told 'im you were movin' to Sherwood, Ohio?
Ram Sweeney : Answer him, dick!
Kurt Kelly : Hey Ram, doesn't this cafeteria have a "No Fags Allowed" rule?
J.D. : Well they, uh, seem to have an open door policy for assholes though, don't they?
Kurt Kelly : What did you say, dickhead?
J.D. : [He sighs, stands, and pulls out a gun] I'll repeat myself.
[He shoots Kurt and Ram]
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Ram Sweeney : [praying in Heather's funeral] Jesus God in Heaven, why'd you have to kill such hot snatch?
[smiles]
Ram Sweeney : It's a joke man. Geez, people are so serious.
[serious face]
Ram Sweeney : Holy Mary who art in Heaven pray for us sinners... so we don't get caught
[grins and looks up worriedly]
Ram Sweeney : Another joke.
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Ram Sweeney : [Veronica has invited Ram and Kurt to have a threesome with her in the woods - there is an awkward pause] So, should I just whip it out, or...?
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Kurt Kelly : It'd be so righteous to be in a Veronica Sawyer/Heather Chandler sandwich.
Ram Sweeney : Oh, hell yes. I wanna set a Heather on my Johnson and just start spinnin' her around like a goddamn pinwheel. Punch it in.
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Ram Sweeney : Let's kick his ass.
Kurt Kelly : Shit man, we're seniors now man. We're too old for that kind of shit.
[pause]
Kurt Kelly : Let's give him a good scare though.
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Ram Sweeney : I'd pay Madonna one million dollars to sit on my face and have her ride like the Kentucky Derby.